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More rednecks and spring water
Took wife and kids to the upper Wakulla River bridge where there is a
sorta landing. The river is beautiful crystal clear cold spring water.
There were a bunch of locals there jumping from the bridge and of
course I had to prove I was one of em so I did too. A state trooper
drove by , slowed, waved and drove on. My guess is that he decided
everybody there coulda hit their heads on rocks without lowering the
collective intelligence of Wakulla County.
My 10 yr old daughter was playing with some young kids, one ten yr
old had a tramp stamp tattoo. One 13 yr old had a TINY, TINY bikini
and the form for it too. I wondered what parent would allow her too
young daughter to dress like that until I saw her mom, serious
cellulite topography and matching leopard print bikini. Made me
remember the joke "You know you are a redneck when you allow your 14
year old daughter to smoke in front of her kids".
Several party barges with one blaring that "Redneck Yacht Club" song.
Most of the men were in fairly good physical shape although looking as
if they were 60 instead of 30, my guess is that most of em are
oystermen. The average woman by herself outweighed my entire family
and had seriously foul mouths.
An airboat came up and one of the ten yr old boys playing with my
daughter said "Wow, a 255 big block chevy" and my daughter said too
loudly, "I HATE AIRBOATS" and suddenly we were unwelcome so we decided
to go on to my sailbaot at Shell Point.
We stopped for boiled peanuts (pronounced "Bold peanuts") at a
roadside stand. The woman selling them was cooking them in an old beer
keg and had a nasty looking bandage on her leg. I asked, "Musta burned
yourself, looks nasty". She replied , "Nah, cottonmouth bite, I put a
tobacco poultice on it to draw out the poison". I was too surprised
that she hadnt gone to the doctor so could only say, "I hope it works"
and she replied "Well, the color's comin back".
Went out on the sailboat in time for sunset andd sailed around in
light wind. My wife kept saying, "Look at it, its so pretty, Why wont
you just watch it". I replied," I can see it and I'm watching my
sails". She says "Just watch the sunset and relax" I say, " I like to
watch my sails too". She says "You ought to just be quiet and watch
the sunset" which gets me fuming. Then she asks "What are you thinking
of" to which I reply "Remembering why I like to sail alone". The sail
back to the dock was quiet and relaxing. |
dbohara
Jul 3
2006
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| >sorta landing. The river is beautiful crystal clear cold spring water. |
JohnH
Jul 3
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| http://boortz.com/images/funny/redneck_pics_tattoo2.jpg |
tschnautz
Jul 3
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| Dear Lord,
Please let that just be a vulgar attempt at humor. Please! |
Bryan
Jul 4
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| Redneck Olympic diving Competition.... http://www.strangecosmos.com/images/content/6154.jpg |
tschnautz
Jul 3
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| Will this never end...dear God help us!!! LOL! --Mike |
MGG
Jul 4
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| This is the last one I'm posting http://www.kygo.com/pageImages/Redneck.jpg you can go to google images,a nd type in "redneck" and get all you can
absolutely stand.... |
tschnautz
Jul 3
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| Now that one is a classic! |
Bryan
Jul 4
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| Some more: http://tinyurl.com/h6bjk redneck wedding http://tinyurl.com/ly33d redneck wedding cake http://tinyurl.com/z58oz redneck dog http://tinyurl.com/l4of9 redneck cruise ship |
Jul 4
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| The cruise ship has fenders !! LOL ... (don't wanna scratch the wood!) |
Dave
Jul 4
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| Here, load up! http://www.redneckworld.com/Redneck_Humor/redneck_humor.html |
tschnautz
Jul 4
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| That stolen shirt video is actually pretty funny and clever, but doesn't
seem to match my idea of redneck. |
Bryan
Jul 4
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| On 4 Jul 2006 08:07:10 -0700, tschnautz@gmail.com penned the following |
Gene
Jul 4
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